put my foot where my mouth is

"Beb kau kat mana? Ke aku salah tempat ni?"
"Kitorang dah on the way."
"Traffic ke?"
"Takde la traffic, jalan block. Ada bawak makanan tak?"
"Ha tak pasal kau ni."
"Takde la ingatkan kau masakkan untuk aku ke apa."
"Ha ha. Pandai atuk kau."
"Oops shit, tak tak."

Stupid line! No I was not proud of that. I said it like gazillion times already it just came out at the wrong time. Bodohhh.

It was Shakir's atuk's funeral.

I've always thought that funeral sucks. Not in a it sucks therefore let's not have it kinda way, but in a .. Ah faham2 sendiri la. But today's funeral was.. different. It didn't really feel like a funeral. I'm not saying it was great, cuz it wasn't. It was sad still. It's just.. There was something missing.

You're accustomed to having a "proper" funeral, baca talkin and siram air mawar and the whole shebang. When it's not there it just doesn't feel right. Nothing's wrong with that either. It's just different. Less depressing I would say. It was quick too.

Ahh anyway. When it's time, it's time, right? I feel sorry for nenek, though. Safwa dah la still in KL tak dapat ticket. She kept saying, 'Nenek teringat kat Safwa tengok kau ni.' Oh man, tear duct dah kena geletek. Watching her at the cemetery after the funeral just did it for the duct. Gila sedih. A husband for 47 years, through thick and thin and up and down, and then one morning, bam! Gone. If you don't feel anything I don't know ah what you are. Si toya sekor tu boleh lagi nak main2, tak guna punya budak. Uncle Glen cakap maybe he's grieving on the inside. Ha ha, yeah ok.

Yeah ok la maybe.

Untuk arwah Atuk Ali, semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat mu ya Allah, dan ditempatkan di kalangan orang-orang beriman insyaAllah.